I have been in Cambodia for a little over a month now. Everyday is a new day. A day to chose joy. A day to chose mourning. A day to chose frustration. Everyday is a new day. What are you choosing in your new days? I firmly believe the Lord has purposes and intentions every day. Every time we wake up there are new revelations to be had.
Being overseas is literally the best thing. and the hardest thing. Its a rollercoaster of emotions, disappointment, and of course, the what ifs. The Lord has said Come to Me since my first week of being here. He showed it to me with the birds, and now He is showing me it from a dear sister and His sweet voice. Let me preface this, I had many expectations walking into this new life in Cambodia…. I was going to start language school by the third week, start building relationships with the women in the bars, and build into the family the Lord has brought me here. So far, the only expectation being met is building into the family the Lord has brought here. I have not started school. I went to bars but havent been able to follow up with the women because of various circumstances. Its been hard when I sometimes feel like the Lord has spoken this huge plan. this dream. but the road to it looks so unclear and so rocky. It makes me wonder how Moses must of felt leading His people to the promised land. I’m sure he had many expectations and many, many disappointments, but the Lord led him to the promised land. He got to see it from afar. I wonder how he felt in that moment. He finally got to the see the dream the Lord had for him. the purpose. however I am sure that it was bittersweet too. He couldn’t physically go into the place… the place he probably dreamed of. I wonder if God’s dream for him was the process of getting to the Promised Land. I wonder if God’s dream was to pour out love and food from heaven to Moses. I wonder if it was God’s dream to reveal Himself through the miracles He performed through Moses and for Moses. Moses fought for the Lord’s way. He knew the end goal and sought after it.
I dont want to miss out on God’s dream for me here because I am full of disappointment. I dont want to miss out on His goodness because I sometimes feel like He stranded me here with this dream without it coming to life yet. I want to live fully in the dream, the reality of God’s love for me. I want to live in a way that my eyes are always on Jesus and not my circumstances. I want to wake up with the joy of the Lord overflowing, so others will ask about Him. He is worthy to follow. Worthy to share about. Worthy to live in joy instead of disappointment on the way to my promised land, the land of women loving Jesus with their whole hearts.
the voice of the Lord says:
Please let go. I know its easy to worry and be afraid, but I dont think you realize the reality that everything is in my hands and it will all end up just as I planned. Stop holding up your problems to me. lay them at the cross! When you continually pick up you’re burdens and hold them over your head.. your arms will become exhausted. Honey, I see your burdens. There’s no need to hold them. Come to the cross. Lay down youre burdens there. Let them go. Walk away. I will take care of your burdens and I will take care of you. You are loved. You are cherished. I will take good care of you.. I always have.
Friends, what is your promised land? How are you getting there? What is the Lord saying about it? Come to the Father. He knows you best and delights in your journey. Also, listen to this song that has been on repeat for me tonight!
I love you all. Let me know your thoughts!
Kris
